me to my friend: i suck at making friends

Also me. I dont do things the hard way, im not weak and I dont walk away. I nearly lost my best friend so I stopped taking my meds. I am really tired right now. I just wanted someone to distract me with nothing because everywhere i go all i see is addiction and death. I tried making a new friend but seems like the only people who get me are the ones supporting people with bigger problems but when im alone i cant handle it very well. I reach out and everyone is busy. I ask AI, its not the same. AI will tell you whatever you want to hear. Its not comfort. Knock and I’ll find it right? Cos i got knock every day to find some shelter from the storm